Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
