drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
