is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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