I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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