We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
