I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
