Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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