Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
