You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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