ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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