butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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