I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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