Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
