The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
