They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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