k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
