I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
