You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
