Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize