I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
