I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
she looked like the before picture.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
