We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
