I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Randomize
