i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
