What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
