The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
