I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
