But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
