K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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