Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
