No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize