Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize