guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
He kissed a someone with a penis
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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