okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Someone came in the potted fern
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
