I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
