people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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