do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
She told me I should be a condom model.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
