I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Girls should come with a carfax report
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
