Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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