I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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