id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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