I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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