what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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