Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
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