Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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