Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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