It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I have fence marks all over my body
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
