So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
