you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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