The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
