he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
people are starting to question the shark bite story
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
